A creative piece by one of my students – they love feedback!
… and for your information, just because I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, doesn’t mean my life’s perfect. No one’s life is perfect … especially not mine.
You see, my dad’s a journalist for some big shot news-paper and my mum’s – well I don’t actually know what she does, just that it involves a lot of money and late nights. (Yeah, that sort of political stuff.)
And me … I’m one year away from a psychotic breakdown.
But from the outside, everything’s fine. Are we religious … well my parents tick the Christian box on the census sheet, but apart from that – no. I don’t even know much more about that stuff from what I learn off TV.
So what’s the problem then? It’s not like I’m that torn over my boyfriend (I barely wasted a single tissue box over him, and it was half empty anyway). I’m not on drugs (I’ve tried them, but never hard-core stuff). And at the end of the year, I can escape from my parents once and for all.
I don’t really know why I hate this environment so much then. I’m sure there are lots of people in the world who would kill for my position, a caring family (*cough-cough*), enough money to make a money tree and most of all a safe warm place to sleep in. There are millions of people in the world worse off than me.
Maybe it’s just part the human instinct, to always want better, to desire more then you currently have … even if you have the world at your finger tips.
At least I’m not the only one feeling this way – I can’t be. In this country of perfection, there’s bound to be plenty of people who feel like they haven’t met the mark. And whether they search for the answers in religion, science, relationships or just stuff, the questions remain the same, along with the desires for … well, just something better!
You can call it depression if you want, or simply the teenage attitude. It might be just wistful thinking for all I know. But no mater what you call it, you can’t deny that those emotions – that big lump of pure emptiness – are still there on their hangers in their wardrobes of isolation, accompanied by nothing but a whole crowd of unhappy ‘loners.
So what are we meant for? Why are we here?
The answers are everywhere, in books, movies, television series, and some of them are quite simple. For example – evolution: We were born to mate to die. And then, there’s the Sci-Fi. ‘You were born to save the world’.
Some people find these answers in raising a family, but I think mine might have put me off. I have no desire what-so-ever to raise a bunch of snivelling brats which leach of me until I’m old and its my turn to return the favour. The sex seems like the only advantage to that, and really, that’s why they invented birth control.
I admit that there’s a slight attraction in the bad. The thrill that you get from knowing that you’re doing wrong, whether it’s smoking who-knows-what at a party in the middle of nowhere, or consistently trudging at exactly ten k’s below the speed in a single lane road just to piss people off.
But then, if you look at it in a ‘philosophical’ way (and God knows I’m not doing that!), spending your whole life attempting to break the rules of society that were put down in place just to try and keep society going is a pretty dismal way to go.
After all, you only get one shot, and if you’re caught … tough luck.
Looking at it though, I guess martyrs have it lucky. They have a desire, a purpose in life, and refuse to let anything change that. Regardless of whether life after death (and all that crud) exists, they have such a belief in this stuff that they’ll do anything for that ‘higher power’.
I think what appeals to me the most, is how untouchable they are, almost like the gods that they believe in. For them to have that power, and not even realise it, to have that purpose, and be only destined to share it.
Oh, I don’t know. I’m just rambling. But maybe there’s something to life after all. Just know, if I ever end up as the person on that stand, on trial, don’t pity me when I die. Instead, be jealous of me, cause I have something better.
Yes world. Be jealous.